Here I am as a South Park character, courtesy of The South Park Character Creator. I’m not a fan of the show, so I don’t remember the characters’ names, but I put myself in the classroom setting to celebrate my new role as a teacher. I don’t actually wear a gray hoodie to class (just everywhere else), though I have gone this week without shaving.

If you want to try it out for yourself, it’s a little tricky to go from the character creator to a final image. It’s a Flash program, so you’ll need to do a screen capture (”Print Screen” on a PC, or use the Grab program on a Mac, and then paste into Photoshop or some other image editing program) if you want to share it with anyone.

I rarely watch TV. I only get two channels - Spike TV and SciFi - so all I ever watch is Monday Night Raw and nothing on SciFi.

Last year, I got hooked on House on Fox, because I’d go see Sara on Tuesday nights, and House was on after American Idol. But not since James Stenbeck returned to As the World Turns in the summer of 2002 have I been hooked on an episodic television program of any kind.

I’d heard a lot about “Lost,” all of it good. So when I saw the Season 1 DVD boxed set was on sale for $39 at Best Buy (with a Best Buy exclusive bonus disc), I decided I’d take a chance on it.

Sara and I sat down at about 10pm last Saturday, figuring to watch the two-part season opener before bed. We ended up watching the first two discs - eight episodes - before calling it a night at 4:30. The next day, we ordered enough pizza for lunch that we could eat leftovers for dinner, so we wouldn’t have to stop watching.

After having some doubts during the first episode, the second one made sure I was hooked. Over the span of about 2 days, we watched all 24 episodes. If not for work Monday, we would have gotten them out of the way quicker.

I’m really pumped for the start of Season 2 this Wednesday, but I’m really curious what it’s going to be like watching the show “live” each week. I got pretty spoiled, being introduced to the series without commercials and without having to wait for the next episode. I was slightly tempted to just wait it out until Season 2 comes out on DVD, but I think it’ll be fun to discuss the season as it goes along.

The island may have nothing on Craig Montgomery, but I’m still looking forward to seeing what’s up its sleeve. Or shaft. Whatever.

After a nice Labor Day weekend, I woke yesterday morning in agony. I had the most intense pain I can EVER remember experiencing running through my neck. This was so intense that my body would just tense up. I got up to go to the bathroom, and the random pulses of pain would make me involuntarily cry out and drop to the floor. I called my mom to try to figure out what was going on. I said lots of things that didn’t make any sense, but I was totally outside of reality. I mean, the first thing I was aware of upon waking up was that my body was contorting and it felt like my neck was plugged into a sparking outlet.

I couldn’t go anywhere. I couldn’t walk across the apartment without hitting the nerve and dropping to the floor, so I sure wasn’t driving anywhere. I was going to have to miss work, and I was worried about trying to call my boss. How lame does “I can’t come to work - my neck hurts” sound? Add to that, if I hit that nerve, I would uncontrollably shout “AAAH!” into the phone, which would undoubtedly sound like amateur theatrics. The hurt-neck version of “I’m sick, *cough cough*.” Thankfully, he was very cool and understanding. By about 4:00, my sister was able to bring me some lunch, so I no longer had an empty stomach to complicate matters.

So after a day of being stranded, alternating ibuprofen and tylenol, ice packs and head pads, my parents came to take me one of those emergency clinics. We sat there for about two hours while I waited my turn, trying to watch the Jim Lehrer news hour with an occasional spasm of pain.

We knew it was just an intense muscle spasm or pinched nerve, so there wasn’t much of a mystery as to what the doctor was going to tell me. The fun part was in the shame of hearing it said out loud that I injured myself sleeping, and discovering I’d get to wear a neck brace for the next few days.

My parents headed home, so Sara took me to Target to get one of those therapeutic support pillows. She mocked me by wanting to stop at an endcap full of s’mores ingredients - it looked like my neck was a giant marshmallow, she said.

So on our way out, wouldn’t you know it, I slipped in a puddle of water on the floor, further straining and hurting my neck. I’ve spent the last day in the haze of painkillers and muscle relaxers, nursing my sleep injury.

And I was wondering how I was going to top my croquet-induced back injury. Sara said, “We’re not going to be able to play Uno, or else you might get a hernia.”